In most places, it's verboten to consider the experiences of sexual relationships as as starkly gendered as they are, and even rarer for anyone to say that the social structure of sexuality is anything more complicated than men oppressing women. Treating romance as the highly contextual reality that it is is a good and useful thing.
These threads are doomed to go sideways because for the most part only frustrated male software engineers show up to them. It's the same dynamic as the feminist groups that produce their kind of toxic dialogue; people who have life sorted out don't show up to talk about it and what's left are people with varying degrees of idiosyncrasy.
I'm saying that if you're trying to understand dynamics of power and sex and your conclusion is that the big issues are men are traumatized because nobody liked them as teens and older women ask for too much, you're so far off the mark from the real world that there's no point in trying to explain the disconnect. My comment wasn't to educate anyone, just a beacon for anyone else who is disheartened by the collective psyche of the folks who post about women on HN.
None of this is disputing the broad gendered trends in "sexual value" (ew) by the way - aging is social hell for women as far as I can tell.
> None of this is disputing the broad gendered trends in "sexual value" (ew) by the way
> aging is social hell for women as far as I can tell
So what you're saying is you actually agree with the notion that older women are less valued and therefore have less leverage and power than younger women.
I don't know about the teens thing but if we accept the above as true then women overestimating their own worth is well within the realm of possibility. So how come you say it's "so far off the mark from the real world"?
You'll catch some h8 for that accurate assessment. How many of the theories posted here have been workshopped with an audience of women? Do some of the people posting even know enough women well enough to ask them to check if their ideas about women are not absurd?
